Tall Tales

 

"You're so silly Sean. I think if I were your wife, I would remember the wedding! You come in here every day telling me that little story about how I came to work here and suddenly forgot 5 years of marriage. But if it were true you would at least have a better picture of us together than the one of you with that flat chested brunette you showed me the other week."

"I swear, my boyfriend would be so mad if he knew I kept givin' you the time of day, but you're such a nice guy I can't help but listen to your crazy stories."

"There's your drink honey, that'll be 6.50 and if some of that change finds its way into my tip jar maybe it will jog my memory!"

"Thanks babe, you're such a sweetie!"

"Your sister?!? I've never met you before today, how could I be your sister?"

"Kelly-Anne told me you were one for a tall tale Sean, but I ain't never heard anythin' so crazy in all my life."

"So you're sayin Kelly-Anne is really your girlfriend and then sumthin changed her from some lame brunette into the stacked blonde she is now with no memory of who she was before?"

"Then you think I'm your sister who you sent to try and convince her of who she really is, but instead I got changed by the same thing that changed her?"

"I dunno cutie pie, for me to believe that I would take an awful lot o' convincing. Besides If I were your sister you wouldn't have spent so much time staring down my top. Not that I mind of course...."

"Anyway... here's your food. Mah tip jar is up by the bar and if you remember little ole me, maybe I might remember you after all...."

"Keep smiling babe, I know that guy is a nut job but he is the best tipper that comes through this place. Did you play along with his story like I said?" "Yeah I played dumb like you said and reminded him where I keep my tip jar."

"Have you checked it yet?"

"Yeah, the loser tipped 200 bucks! He must really believe that pathetic little story of his."

"I know right! Though I gotta say even if I did believe him, the girl he keeps showing me pictures of looks so lame and think how it would be being married to that sad sack!"

"Haha, yeah as if you would ever give up what you have with Brad for a loser like that."

"Exactly! But gotta keep that cash cow sweet I guess. Next time he comes in I'm gonna pretend I'm starting to remember, I can't wait to see him lap it up. It's just so easy and so fun to mess with him."

"Anyway, there are a couple of studs at table 17 that need serving, the one with the tats looks like your type too, so you might want to check out if he measures up."

"Thanks babe, you're always looking out for me!"